Hey, guys. Tim Howell here. BRAVES FAN and OPTIMISTIC MAN!! That’s me. So what say we dispense with all the negativity for a little while. I thought I’d pop over … Continue Reading Open Thread, 4.22, Hello, #Braves fans, I’m Tim Howell
You might be asking yourself, “Self, where’s Duane been? We ain’t heard from that smart, handsome fucker in a long time.” You’d be right! But here I am, in Whorelando–ha, … Continue Reading Duane checks in from the Mouse/Open Thread Aug. 14, #Braves vs. Serpents
Remember Dave? Condescending. Ill tempered. Moussed-up ‘do that looked like Afalfa’s from The Little Rascals. (Assuming Dave used a picture of himself with his disapproving comments.) He had the gall … Continue Reading Office’s 10th Anniversary Gala Goes Awry
Hey, peeeeps. Sorry if I have a few more typos than usual in this article. I’m recovering and I ain’t quite right yet. What are you recovering from, Duane? Good … Continue Reading Duane checks in as he recuperates from a beating
By Tim Howell A wise man — or let’s say person, for you gals out there! — once told me that when you frown, you frown alone. But when you … Continue Reading Enough with all this Gloomy Gus Business!
The Office has obtained internal documents detailing blockbuster promotional plans for inaugurating SunTrust Park on the outskirts of Smyrna. We used the Freedom of Made-up Information Act to get our … Continue Reading Welcome to Cobb County, Braves fans!
By Duane From Forest Park Do you hate bosses as much as I do? Get this. Few nights ago, I’m stocking shelves at the porno video store on 75 south … Continue Reading #Braves aren’t only ones on a losing streak
First off, I didn’t know there was a word that’s the same as Big Ol Hangdog Harang’s last name. Headline writers. Bunch of pointy-headed dorks. Speaking of loser nerds, I … Continue Reading Duane’s Harang Harangue
And welcome back to me, I guess. I won’t bore y’all with the whole story, but let’s just say I got fired from the Starship Satellite location up in White … Continue Reading Duane says, “Welcome back, Danny Uggs!”
For more inane musings, follow @BlackLarryKing on Twitter If time begins on Opening Day, where does it spend the offseason? They should tell you this stuff! … He may have … Continue Reading @BlackLarryKing’s Spring Training Things
Dammit. Dammit. Dammit. Where in the hell do I start? OK. The Braves took a jackhammer to my heart and soul again. And I’m so confused and hurt and angry. … Continue Reading Duane is in crisis
In honor of Adam Wainwright’s latest gem … a new dispatch from Hahira: Sorry it’s been so long since my last column. That bruised knuckle took two years to heal, … Continue Reading J.D. Drew’s Diary returns (retirement edition)
I see where Mr. Frank Spin, um I mean Wren, is telling Mark Bradford from the local outlet that everything is just fine. Might be the best team he’s put … Continue Reading Duane checks in
World Net Daily recently published a fawning piece on the persecuted ex-Brave John Rocker. In the article, the former closer shares his views on subjects such as immigration reform, the … Continue Reading A chat with former Brave Lonnie Smith
Yeah, I know. I can hear all y’all smart fellas now. “Come on, now, Duane, it’s just spring training. They ain’t even really trying to win. The capital of Iran … Continue Reading Big win today
Fellas, I’m writing with a heavy heart. And I ain’t talking about Frank Wren trying to trade away Marty Prado and JJ Jurgens for some dadgum modern-day Mike Lum. Naw. Some … Continue Reading Duane checks in, and it ain’t a happy new year
Sox personnel were baffled as to why J.D. Drew played so little in September with a minor knuckle fracture. I thought the BoSox braintrust was supposed to be smart. How … Continue Reading Inspiration for J.D.’s diary
1. Bill Campbell/Munson Steed Olympic Street Vending Night. Remember during the 1996 Games, when our disgraced former mayor gave his pal a sweetheart deal to turn downtown into a giant … Continue Reading Future Braves promotions
Hey, y’alls. It’s Hal. Why no exclamation sensation at the end of that sentence? Well, I have some sad news. For me, anyhow. Be that as it may — I … Continue Reading You won’t have me to kick around anymore
Hey, fellas, and gals. Is there a form of fella to apply to the ladies? I really don’t know. My name is Hal Phellis. I’m new to this webloggin’ thing, so you guys … Continue Reading It’s that time again!!