No matter what, bad things tend to happen when the Bravos play the Red Sux. For one, it pollutes Hank Aaron Drive with 20,000 (or more) passengers on the most overcrowded bandwagon in the history of bandwagons. I still can’t go to Target on Moreland Avenue, or a Wendy’s off I-85 in Alabama, and NOT see some jack ass in a Red Sox cap.
Fuck you, Boston cap wearer. You’re tiresome. You’re irksome. You’re loathsome. Sports fans across the country despise you and your chants. Why can’t you be civilized like Cardinals fans?
Anyway, I’m guessing when this weird four-game series comes south, we might see fewer of the infernal sox fans since their high-priced collection of phonies, loafers, fat boys and absurdly overpaid fourth starters is 10 games under .500. The Braves marketing geniuses are offering ticket specials for the games. They would not be doing so if they’d sold 90,000 ducats for the two dates. But we shall see. I won’t be there. There’s something about paying money to seethe, surrounded by people from Tennessee and Tucker who cheer for a Boston team, that I’ve decided to avoid.
Annoying fans aside, the main bad thing that happens when these teams meet is the Braves generally lose, no matter what. Los Bravos are 3-10 against Boston over the past six seasons. They’ve only met in three of those years, though it seems like they’ve played more often. Last year the Red Sox had lost 10 in a row when along came the Braves and–voila–10 straight L’s became four straight W’s vs. our heroes.
Boston has lost six straight and just got horse-whipped by Toronto, which amassed 31 runs in 3 games vs. Beantown’s abominable pitching. Trouble is, our pitching, particularly the relievers of course, has been about as abominable of late. So we cross our fingers, try not to get too despondent and hope these four days pass quickly. At least that’s my approach.
Maybe Sugar Ray and Ryan Lavarnway will bring us luck. They are with the Braves in place of Todd Cunningham and Bethancourt. Maybe Christian can find himself in Buford. Lord knows, his season could hardly get worse.
Tonight’s lineup: Peterson 4, Maybin 8, Freeman 3, Markakis 9, Uribe 5, KJohnson DH, Pierzynski 2, Gomes 7, Simmons 6 (Perez 1).