Could Scott Thorman be far behind?

Everyone’s favorite .211-hitting, PED-using centerfielder is coming back! Yep, the Braves, for some reason, have picked up Jordan Schafer off waivers from Houston.

I’m going to assume this is one of those what-the-hell-nothing-to-lose moves. If this is any indication of how we’re going to replace Bourn, we shudder. It can’t be. Then again, we replaced Greg Maddux with John Thomson. That was different, one spot of five. We only play one center fielder.

If Schafer opens 2013 in center field for the Braves, I’ll read a book by Sean Hannity. I’d sooner eat the carpet under my desk chair than read a book by Sean Hannity.

In other matters, good moves to pick up the options of McCann, Huddy and Maholm. McCann will make a chunk of money. But you’re highly unlikely to find anyone better for next season. Keep him one more year, and Bethancourt should be ready for 2014. Meantime, work to sign Heyward and Freeman long-term, now.