John Rocker is a whiny little bitch

Hard to tell what’s more tortured in John Rocker’s new tome, “Scars and Strikes” — the writing or the ex-Brave’s insistence that he is a victim.

I died on a Sunday evening. While dining at a restaurant in Melbourne, Florida, on December 19, 1999, I came face to face with the grim reaper, who appeared before me in the form of media’s biased scrutiny and rabid lust for the sensational, and watched as my soul was put to death right before my very eyes. There was no discretion taken, there was no objectivity considered, there was no truth sought: A mafia-style murder with a proverbial bullet to the back of the head to appease the godfather. …

Former SI writer Jeff Pearlman even had the audacity to write something critical of Roger Clemens, Rocker writes.

In the grotesque work, “The Rocket That Fell to Earth” Pearlman uses quite a holier-than-thou approach in his chastisement of perhaps the games greatest and most decorated pitcher of all time, Roger Clemens. To which Clemens responded, “He’s a low life wanna-be. By his looks he could star on ‘The Addams Family.’”

Hey Shit for Brains, you pitched on the same team as Greg Maddux yet you label fellow cheater Roger Clemens “the greatest pitcher of all time!?!” You really are an idiot.

But still, we should pity him.

Make no mistake about it, however, everything inside of me that day, everything I worked a lifetime to become, who I was at the core of my being which took more than a decade to create was laid to waste in one fell blow all for the sake of selling a few fucking magazines. The death to my one chance in life, the death of my hopes and dreams, which will never be again. The death of my family’s name. All for $3.95. At this point all that’s left is a flesh-covered shell inhabited by a beating heart right next to where a soul once existed. I hope it was worth it.

Rocker repeatedly implies that Jeff Pearlman destroyed his career, neglecting to mention that he had a 6.00 ERA and 1.750 WHIP after being traded from the Braves.

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11 Comments on John Rocker is a whiny little bitch

  1. the real big cat // June 4, 2012 at 1:35 pm //

    What’s really sad is he still thinks somebody gives a rat’s ass.

  2. The far right has taken up his case. WorldNetDaily, the home page for truthers and xenophobes, calls him a “patriot.”

  3. charlesad // June 4, 2012 at 3:26 pm //

    I don’t think many people give a rat’s ass. I think John Rocker wants to make money.

  4. RJR Squeeze Bunt // June 4, 2012 at 6:17 pm //

    Seriously, read that out load in your best Kenny Powers voice. It’s perfect, except what Rocker is saying is even more outrageous than the fiction from Eastbound and Down.

  5. rankin' rob // June 4, 2012 at 6:28 pm //

    Rocker would have to go to finishing school to have more class than Kenny Powers…

  6. Tokyokie // June 4, 2012 at 9:46 pm //

    I’m trying to figure out how his soul was shot before his very eyes when it was shot in the back of the skull.

  7. Jack Straw // June 4, 2012 at 10:12 pm //

    Opprobrium hasn’t worked, but electricity might shut Rocker up. Short bursts for about an hour and a half.

  8. Apparently he had this to say recently about the upcoming presidential election as well…

    http://network.yardbarker.com/all_sports/article_external/john_rocker_says_hed_vote_for_the_devil_over_barack_obama/10940294

  9. rankin' rob // June 5, 2012 at 7:52 am //

    LOL

  10. clete boyer fan // June 5, 2012 at 11:13 am //

    I’m sure that Luke Scott is Rocker’s favorite current major leaguer.

  11. Yeah, strange that Luke Scott is allowed to play, considering Rocker’s thesis that he was blacklisted because of his politically incorrect musings.

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